Thursday, July 11, 2013

'Dan's Birthday' turned 'Dan Has Mono' because I hadn't told yall about the mono and will post the birthday one later

First of all, Dan has mono. Have we discussed this? I don't think we have.

I was going to do a post about his birthday, but let's talk about Dan.

Who gets mono at 27? 

Who gets mono at 27 when their pregnant wife doesn't have it? 

He played beer pong with some guys a few weeks prior to getting it. And by some guys, I mean about 30 guys. And there's no telling if the solo cups were even new that day. Many games of beer pong have been played in that house. And my germ-o-phobe husband drank out of each cup, instead of having his own cup like he neurotically did all throughout college


My doctor tested me for mono, just to see if I had had it in the past or was about to start feeling awful. Apparently I have had mono in the past (never had any symptoms) and am now immune. 

Dan read that if you have had mono, and your immune system is down (pregnancy) you can shed some of the virus to other people. (If it's on the internet it must be true, right?) So he is blaming me. Catching it from beer pong just couldn't be logical. 

Some people take 2-4 weeks off of work or school. But Dan just pressed on. Looking absolutely awful by the end of the work day (love you!). He had a fever for the first 10 days straight, and since then just had the exhaustion that comes with it. He had barely been eating. Bed sounded much better than any food. And lost a little weight. Luckily he had this week off of work, he is finishing week three of this virus, and feeling MUCH better.

Trust me, he has been given lots of sympathy and been tended to. Yadda, yadda. But for now, let's make fun of him.

Things not to say to your 6 months pregnant wife:

"Omg, Kelley. I just lost 7 pounds this week, not even trying. I hope I gain it back." 


"Ugh, I can't do ab ripper for at least another month. Do you know how much that sucks?"


"I can't drink alcohol for an entire month!?!"


and my personal favorite...

"This has been miserable. I'm exhausted. I could sleep all day. I'm nauseous. I have no energy and can't work out like I used to. And its supposed to last 4-6 weeks!"


I am not going to lie, I have kind of enjoyed him having mono. Besides the question of who is going to do the heavy lifting in the house, of course. I have had someone ready to go to bed around 9. Someone actually more tired than myself. And I have hardly had to cook dinner. Don't tell Dan, but I'm okay with this lasting awhile. But it better correct itself by October!

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